From my experience we are made via our genetics and upbringing to begin with, you cannot do much about the genetics those you have to accept, in this people tell us what they will and will not accept, and so being children we learn unconsciously to sacrifice pieces of ourselves, and they become our shadow, which in turn reaks havoc in our adult lives until we make them conscious, you may see yourself as the empath, but really your empathy is control, it gives you moral superiority and crosses people's boundaries, the whole time your focus is outwards, changing others, inside you have no sense of self other than "being needed." Perfectionist "you're not good enough, you must be perfect, it must be perfect," all messages passed down from authority roles, being around a perfectionist is very difficult, they are intolerant, unyielding, not much fun, great critics. It's not their fault because that side was properly never allowed, it was deemed as Tom foolery, stupidity etc. So first things first, Is it them or your shadow? Because to an extent you can't change others, unless everyone has a conscious awakening at our stiferlin and sick society, but you can, if your brave enough look at your own shadow, because others will see it, but it depends whether you are willing to, drop the persona, pick up the hidden shadow and embrace it.

When people ask, How is life treating you? It is a way of asking how you are doing? But life itself does not bring problems. Life is a gift. It's the bad decisions made and the bad people who make a person's life a living hell.